More and more often I hear that one can only earn respect and power only if one can use the NO word as needed.
NO is the most fearest word - it is said to close doors, to shut down opportunities, to bring sadness into one's heart, to make both parties suffer from the consequences of a NO.
BUT... it's also a differentiator, in a world where people are more and more discussing about leadership and how to manage expectations, and how to achieve more with less. NO means making the right choices, in the right moment.
I find it really difficult to use, and I've found one great resource to give me power to use it. I've learned that the NO can also be POSITIVE, and it's really surprising when you hear about this at first.
How can a NO be positive???
Yet, if you say it correctly, if your NO is for the specific situation, and not to a whole relation, if you deny only the possibility of that opportunity, but you stay true to your ideals, to what you value most, and know how to say it, then it is indeed a POSITIVE NO. It's not an easy task to deliver negative messages, but you always have to think about what you want to achieve by saying NO. And it then becomes a lot more simple to say it, and to keep the relationship with the person.
As there are many others that have written about the power of a positive NO, I will not elaborate more on this.
What I would like you to do, is to THINK about one situation where you had to say NO, and how you could have done it differently. If you need a new way to deliver it, please read this book, it's a great example and an inspiring one. It's not easy, but with some practice and with feedback, anyone can deliver a POSITIVE NO.